-------------------- Forwarded by Salwani Abdullah 0147/Undang-undang/KLN
on 05/30/98 02:36 PM ---------------------------
John Louis O'Hara 0026
05/28/98 06:18 PM
To: Salwani Abdullah 0147/Undang-undang/KLN@KLN
cc:
Subject: English as it will be spoken by the Europeans.
>
> The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English
will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was
the
other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government
conceded that English spelling has some room for improvement and has
accepted a 5 year phase in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish"
:--
>
> In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".
Sertainly, this will
make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be
dropped in
facour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards
kan have
one less letter.
>
> There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f". This
will make words
like "fotograf" 20% shorter.
>
> In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted
to
reach the the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.Governments
will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a
deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of
the silent "e"s in the language is disgraceful, and they should
go away.
>
> By the 4th year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing
"th"
with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz
year, ze unesesary "o" kan be
dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors
be aplid
to ozer kombinations of letters.
>
> After zis fifz year, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil
be
no mor trobls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand
ech
ozer.
>
> ZE DREM VIL FINALY KOM TRU!!!!